TPTT The Famous History of the Life of Henry the Eighth: ACT II
Introduction
THE PROLOGUE
ACT I
ACT II
SCENE I. Westminster. A street.
SCENE II. An ante-chamber in the palace.
SCENE III. An ante-chamber of the QUEEN'S apartments.
SCENE IV. A hall in Black-Friars.
ACT III
ACT IV
ACT V
About the Play
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SCENE III. An ante-chamber of the QUEEN'S apartments.
Enter ANNE and an Old Lady
ANNE
      Not for that neither: here's the pang that pinches:
      His highness having lived so long with her, and she
      So good a lady that no tongue could ever
      Pronounce dishonour of her; by my life,
5     She never knew harm-doing: O, now, after
      So many courses of the sun enthroned,
      Still growing in a majesty and pomp, the which
      To leave a thousand-fold more bitter than
      'Tis sweet at first to acquire,--after this process,
10    To give her the avaunt! it is a pity
      Would move a monster.
Old Lady
      Hearts of most hard temper
      Melt and lament for her.
ANNE
      O, God's will! much better
15    She ne'er had known pomp: though't be temporal,
      Yet, if that quarrel, fortune, do divorce
      It from the bearer, 'tis a sufferance panging
      As soul and body's severing.
Old Lady
      Alas, poor lady!
20    She's a stranger now again.
ANNE
      So much the more
      Must pity drop upon her. Verily,
      I swear, 'tis better to be lowly born,
      And range with humble livers in content,
25    Than to be perk'd up in a glistering grief,
      And wear a golden sorrow.
Old Lady
      Our content
      Is our best having.
ANNE
      By my troth and maidenhead,
30    I would not be a queen.
Old Lady
      Beshrew me, I would,
      And venture maidenhead for't; and so would you,
      For all this spice of your hypocrisy:
      You, that have so fair parts of woman on you,
35    Have too a woman's heart; which ever yet
      Affected eminence, wealth, sovereignty;
      Which, to say sooth, are blessings; and which gifts,
      Saving your mincing, the capacity
      Of your soft cheveril conscience would receive,
40    If you might please to stretch it.
ANNE
      Nay, good troth.
Old Lady
      Yes, troth, and troth; you would not be a queen?
ANNE
      No, not for all the riches under heaven.
Old Lady:
      'Tis strange: a three-pence bow'd would hire me,
45    Old as I am, to queen it: but, I pray you,
      What think you of a duchess? have you limbs
      To bear that load of title?
ANNE
      No, in truth.
Old Lady
      Then you are weakly made: pluck off a little;
50    I would not be a young count in your way,
      For more than blushing comes to: if your back
      Cannot vouchsafe this burthen,'tis too weak
      Ever to get a boy.
ANNE
      How you do talk!
55    I swear again, I would not be a queen
      For all the world.
Old Lady
      In faith, for little England
      You'ld venture an emballing: I myself
      Would for Carnarvonshire, although there long'd
60    No more to the crown but that. Lo, who comes here?
Enter Chamberlain
Chamberlain
      Good morrow, ladies. What were't worth to know
      The secret of your conference?
ANNE
      My good lord,
      Not your demand; it values not your asking:
65    Our mistress' sorrows we were pitying.
Chamberlain
      It was a gentle business, and becoming
      The action of good women: there is hope
      All will be well.
ANNE
      Now, I pray God, amen!
Chamberlain
70    You bear a gentle mind, and heavenly blessings
      Follow such creatures. That you may, fair lady,
      Perceive I speak sincerely, and high note's
      Ta'en of your many virtues, the king's majesty
      Commends his good opinion of you, and
75    Does purpose honour to you no less flowing
      Than Marchioness of Pembroke: to which title
      A thousand pound a year, annual support,
      Out of his grace he adds.
ANNE
      I do not know
80    What kind of my obedience I should tender;
      More than my all is nothing: nor my prayers
      Are not words duly hallow'd, nor my wishes
      More worth than empty vanities; yet prayers and wishes
      Are all I can return. Beseech your lordship,
85    Vouchsafe to speak my thanks and my obedience,
      As from a blushing handmaid, to his highness;
      Whose health and royalty I pray for.
Chamberlain
      Lady,
      I shall not fail to approve the fair conceit
90    The king hath of you.

Aside

      I have perused her well;
      Beauty and honour in her are so mingled
      That they have caught the king: and who knows yet
      But from this lady may proceed a gem
95    To lighten all this isle? I'll to the king,
      And say I spoke with you.
Exit Chamberlain
ANNE
      My honour'd lord.
Old Lady
      Why, this it is; see, see!
      I have been begging sixteen years in court,
100   Am yet a courtier beggarly, nor could
      Come pat betwixt too early and too late
      For any suit of pounds; and you, O fate!
      A very fresh-fish here--fie, fie, fie upon
      This compell'd fortune!--have your mouth fill'd up
105   Before you open it.
ANNE
      This is strange to me.
Old Lady
      How tastes it? is it bitter? forty pence, no.
      There was a lady once, 'tis an old story,
      That would not be a queen, that would she not,
110   For all the mud in Egypt: have you heard it?
ANNE
      Come, you are pleasant.
Old Lady
      With your theme, I could
      O'ermount the lark. The Marchioness of Pembroke!
      A thousand pounds a year for pure respect!
115   No other obligation! By my life,
      That promises moe thousands: honour's train
      Is longer than his foreskirt. By this time
      I know your back will bear a duchess: say,
      Are you not stronger than you were?
ANNE
120   Good lady,
      Make yourself mirth with your particular fancy,
      And leave me out on't. Would I had no being,
      If this salute my blood a jot: it faints me,
      To think what follows.
125   The queen is comfortless, and we forgetful
      In our long absence: pray, do not deliver
      What here you've heard to her.
Old Lady
      What do you think me?
Exeunt
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