TPTT The Tragedy of King Lear: ACT I
Introduction
ACT I
SCENE I. King Lear's palace.
SCENE II. The Earl of Gloucester's castle.
SCENE III. The Duke of Albany's palace.
SCENE IV. A hall in the same.
SCENE V. Court before the same.
ACT II
ACT III
ACT IV
ACT V
About the Play
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SCENE V. Court before the same.
Enter KING LEAR, KENT, and Fool
KING LEAR
      Go you before to Gloucester with these letters.
      Acquaint my daughter no further with any thing you
      know than comes from her demand out of the letter.
      If your diligence be not speedy, I shall be there afore you.
KENT
5     I will not sleep, my lord, till I have delivered
      your letter.
Exit
Fool
      If a man's brains were in's heels, were't not in
      danger of kibes?
KING LEAR
      Ay, boy.
Fool
10    Then, I prithee, be merry; thy wit shall ne'er go
      slip-shod.
KING LEAR
      Ha, ha, ha!
Fool
      Shalt see thy other daughter will use thee kindly;
      for though she's as like this as a crab's like an
15    apple, yet I can tell what I can tell.
KING LEAR
      Why, what canst thou tell, my boy?
Fool
      She will taste as like this as a crab does to a
      crab. Thou canst tell why one's nose stands i'
      the middle on's face?
KING LEAR
20    No.
Fool
      Why, to keep one's eyes of either side's nose; that
      what a man cannot smell out, he may spy into.
KING LEAR
      I did her wrong--
Fool
      Canst tell how an oyster makes his shell?
KING LEAR
25    No.
Fool
      Nor I neither; but I can tell why a snail has a house.
KING LEAR
      Why?
Fool
      Why, to put his head in; not to give it away to his
      daughters, and leave his horns without a case.
KING LEAR
30    I will forget my nature. So kind a father! Be my
      horses ready?
Fool
      Thy asses are gone about 'em. The reason why the
      seven stars are no more than seven is a pretty reason.
KING LEAR
      Because they are not eight?
Fool
35    Yes, indeed: thou wouldst make a good fool.
KING LEAR
      To take 't again perforce! Monster ingratitude!
Fool
      If thou wert my fool, nuncle, I'ld have thee beaten
      for being old before thy time.
KING LEAR
      How's that?
Fool
40    Thou shouldst not have been old till thou hadst
      been wise.
KING LEAR
      O, let me not be mad, not mad, sweet heaven
      Keep me in temper: I would not be mad!

Enter Gentleman

      How now! are the horses ready?
Gentleman
45    Ready, my lord.
KING LEAR
      Come, boy.
Fool
      She that's a maid now, and laughs at my departure,
      Shall not be a maid long, unless things be cut shorter.
Exeunt
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