Much Ado about Nothing: ACT V , SCENE II. LEONATO'S garden.

Much Ado about Nothing: ACT V


	Introduction

	ACT I

	ACT II

	ACT III

	ACT IV

	ACT V

		SCENE I. Before LEONATO'S house.

		SCENE II. LEONATO'S garden.

		SCENE III. A church.

		SCENE IV. A room in LEONATO'S house.

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SCENE II. LEONATO'S garden.

Enter BENEDICK and MARGARET, meeting

BENEDICK

Pray thee, sweet Mistress Margaret, deserve well at
my hands by helping me to the speech of Beatrice.

MARGARET

Will you then write me a sonnet in praise of my beauty?

BENEDICK

      In so high a style, Margaret, that no man living
5     shall come over it; for, in most comely truth, thou
      deservest it.

MARGARET

To have no man come over me! why, shall I always
keep below stairs?

BENEDICK

Thy wit is as quick as the greyhound's mouth; it catches.

MARGARET

10 And yours as blunt as the fencer's foils, which hit,
but hurt not.

BENEDICK

      A most manly wit, Margaret; it will not hurt a
      woman: and so, I pray thee, call Beatrice: I give
      thee the bucklers.

MARGARET

15 Give us the swords; we have bucklers of our own.

BENEDICK

If you use them, Margaret, you must put in the
pikes with a vice; and they are dangerous weapons for maids.

MARGARET

Well, I will call Beatrice to you, who I think hath legs.

BENEDICK

And therefore will come.

Exit MARGARET

Sings

20    The god of love,
      That sits above,
      And knows me, and knows me,
      How pitiful I deserve,--
      I mean in singing; but in loving, Leander the good
25    swimmer, Troilus the first employer of panders, and
      a whole bookful of these quondam carpet-mangers,
      whose names yet run smoothly in the even road of a
      blank verse, why, they were never so truly turned
      over and over as my poor self in love. Marry, I
30    cannot show it in rhyme; I have tried: I can find
      out no rhyme to 'lady' but 'baby,' an innocent
      rhyme; for 'scorn,' 'horn,' a hard rhyme; for,
      'school,' 'fool,' a babbling rhyme; very ominous
      endings: no, I was not born under a rhyming planet,
35    nor I cannot woo in festival terms.

Enter BEATRICE

Sweet Beatrice, wouldst thou come when I called thee?

BEATRICE

Yea, signior, and depart when you bid me.

BENEDICK

O, stay but till then!

BEATRICE

      'Then' is spoken; fare you well now: and yet, ere
40    I go, let me go with that I came; which is, with
      knowing what hath passed between you and Claudio.

BENEDICK

Only foul words; and thereupon I will kiss thee.

BEATRICE

      Foul words is but foul wind, and foul wind is but
      foul breath, and foul breath is noisome; therefore I
45    will depart unkissed.

BENEDICK

      Thou hast frighted the word out of his right sense,
      so forcible is thy wit. But I must tell thee
      plainly, Claudio undergoes my challenge; and either
      I must shortly hear from him, or I will subscribe
50    him a coward. And, I pray thee now, tell me for
      which of my bad parts didst thou first fall in love with me?

BEATRICE

      For them all together; which maintained so politic
      a state of evil that they will not admit any good
      part to intermingle with them. But for which of my
55    good parts did you first suffer love for me?

BENEDICK

Suffer love! a good epithet! I do suffer love
indeed, for I love thee against my will.

BEATRICE

      In spite of your heart, I think; alas, poor heart!
      If you spite it for my sake, I will spite it for
60    yours; for I will never love that which my friend hates.

BENEDICK

Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably.

BEATRICE

It appears not in this confession: there's not one
wise man among twenty that will praise himself.

BENEDICK

      An old, an old instance, Beatrice, that lived in
65    the lime of good neighbours. If a man do not erect
      in this age his own tomb ere he dies, he shall live
      no longer in monument than the bell rings and the
      widow weeps.

BEATRICE

And how long is that, think you?

BENEDICK

70    Question: why, an hour in clamour and a quarter in
      rheum: therefore is it most expedient for the
      wise, if Don Worm, his conscience, find no
      impediment to the contrary, to be the trumpet of his
      own virtues, as I am to myself. So much for
75    praising myself, who, I myself will bear witness, is
      praiseworthy: and now tell me, how doth your cousin?

BEATRICE

Very ill.

BENEDICK

And how do you?

BEATRICE

Very ill too.

BENEDICK

80 Serve God, love me and mend. There will I leave
you too, for here comes one in haste.

Enter URSULA

URSULA

      Madam, you must come to your uncle. Yonder's old
      coil at home: it is proved my Lady Hero hath been
      falsely accused, the prince and Claudio mightily
85    abused; and Don John is the author of all, who is
      fed and gone. Will you come presently?

BEATRICE

Will you go hear this news, signior?

BENEDICK

      I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap, and be
      buried in thy eyes; and moreover I will go with
90    thee to thy uncle's.

Exeunt

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