TPTT The Two Gentlemen of Verona: ACT I
Introduction
ACT I
SCENE I. Verona. An open place.
SCENE II. The same. Garden of JULIA's house.
SCENE III. The same. ANTONIO's house.
ACT II
ACT III
ACT IV
ACT V
About the Play
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SCENE I. Verona. An open place.
Enter VALENTINE and PROTEUS
VALENTINE
      Cease to persuade, my loving Proteus:
      Home-keeping youth have ever homely wits.
      Were't not affection chains thy tender days
      To the sweet glances of thy honour'd love,
5     I rather would entreat thy company
      To see the wonders of the world abroad,
      Than, living dully sluggardized at home,
      Wear out thy youth with shapeless idleness.
      But since thou lovest, love still and thrive therein,
10    Even as I would when I to love begin.
PROTEUS
      Wilt thou be gone? Sweet Valentine, adieu!
      Think on thy Proteus, when thou haply seest
      Some rare note-worthy object in thy travel:
      Wish me partaker in thy happiness
15    When thou dost meet good hap; and in thy danger,
      If ever danger do environ thee,
      Commend thy grievance to my holy prayers,
      For I will be thy beadsman, Valentine.
VALENTINE
      And on a love-book pray for my success?
PROTEUS
20    Upon some book I love I'll pray for thee.
VALENTINE
      That's on some shallow story of deep love:
      How young Leander cross'd the Hellespont.
PROTEUS
      That's a deep story of a deeper love:
      For he was more than over shoes in love.
VALENTINE
25    'Tis true; for you are over boots in love,
      And yet you never swum the Hellespont.
PROTEUS
      Over the boots? nay, give me not the boots.
VALENTINE
      No, I will not, for it boots thee not.
PROTEUS
      What?
VALENTINE
30    To be in love, where scorn is bought with groans;
      Coy looks with heart-sore sighs; one fading moment's mirth
      With twenty watchful, weary, tedious nights:
      If haply won, perhaps a hapless gain;
      If lost, why then a grievous labour won;
35    However, but a folly bought with wit,
      Or else a wit by folly vanquished.
PROTEUS
      So, by your circumstance, you call me fool.
VALENTINE
      So, by your circumstance, I fear you'll prove.
PROTEUS
      'Tis love you cavil at: I am not Love.
VALENTINE
40    Love is your master, for he masters you:
      And he that is so yoked by a fool,
      Methinks, should not be chronicled for wise.
PROTEUS
      Yet writers say, as in the sweetest bud
      The eating canker dwells, so eating love
45    Inhabits in the finest wits of all.
VALENTINE
      And writers say, as the most forward bud
      Is eaten by the canker ere it blow,
      Even so by love the young and tender wit
      Is turn'd to folly, blasting in the bud,
50    Losing his verdure even in the prime
      And all the fair effects of future hopes.
      But wherefore waste I time to counsel thee,
      That art a votary to fond desire?
      Once more adieu! my father at the road
55    Expects my coming, there to see me shipp'd.
PROTEUS
      And thither will I bring thee, Valentine.
VALENTINE
      Sweet Proteus, no; now let us take our leave.
      To Milan let me hear from thee by letters
      Of thy success in love, and what news else
60    Betideth here in absence of thy friend;
      And likewise will visit thee with mine.
PROTEUS
      All happiness bechance to thee in Milan!
VALENTINE
      As much to you at home! and so, farewell.
Exit
PROTEUS
      He after honour hunts, I after love:
65    He leaves his friends to dignify them more,
      I leave myself, my friends and all, for love.
      Thou, Julia, thou hast metamorphosed me,
      Made me neglect my studies, lose my time,
      War with good counsel, set the world at nought;
70    Made wit with musing weak, heart sick with thought.
Enter SPEED
SPEED
      Sir Proteus, save you! Saw you my master?
PROTEUS
      But now he parted hence, to embark for Milan.
SPEED
      Twenty to one then he is shipp'd already,
      And I have play'd the sheep in losing him.
PROTEUS
75    Indeed, a sheep doth very often stray,
      An if the shepherd be a while away.
SPEED
      You conclude that my master is a shepherd, then,
      and I a sheep?
PROTEUS
      I do.
SPEED
80    Why then, my horns are his horns, whether I wake or sleep.
PROTEUS
      A silly answer and fitting well a sheep.
SPEED
      This proves me still a sheep.
PROTEUS
      True; and thy master a shepherd.
SPEED
      Nay, that I can deny by a circumstance.
PROTEUS
85    It shall go hard but I'll prove it by another.
SPEED
      The shepherd seeks the sheep, and not the sheep the
      shepherd; but I seek my master, and my master seeks
      not me: therefore I am no sheep.
PROTEUS
      The sheep for fodder follow the shepherd; the
90    shepherd for food follows not the sheep: thou for
      wages followest thy master; thy master for wages
      follows not thee: therefore thou art a sheep.
SPEED
      Such another proof will make me cry 'baa.'
PROTEUS
      But, dost thou hear? gavest thou my letter to Julia?
SPEED
95    Ay sir: I, a lost mutton, gave your letter to her,
      a laced mutton, and she, a laced mutton, gave me, a
      lost mutton, nothing for my labour.
PROTEUS
      Here's too small a pasture for such store of muttons.
SPEED
      If the ground be overcharged, you were best stick her.
PROTEUS
100   Nay: in that you are astray, 'twere best pound you.
SPEED
      Nay, sir, less than a pound shall serve me for
      carrying your letter.
PROTEUS
      You mistake; I mean the pound,--a pinfold.
SPEED
      From a pound to a pin? fold it over and over,
105   'Tis threefold too little for carrying a letter to
      your lover.
PROTEUS
      But what said she?
SPEED
      (First nodding) Ay.
PROTEUS
      Nod--Ay--why, that's noddy.
SPEED
110   You mistook, sir; I say, she did nod: and you ask
      me if she did nod; and I say, 'Ay.'
PROTEUS
      And that set together is noddy.
SPEED
      Now you have taken the pains to set it together,
      take it for your pains.
PROTEUS
115   No, no; you shall have it for bearing the letter.
SPEED
      Well, I perceive I must be fain to bear with you.
PROTEUS
      Why sir, how do you bear with me?
SPEED
      Marry, sir, the letter, very orderly; having nothing
      but the word 'noddy' for my pains.
PROTEUS
120   Beshrew me, but you have a quick wit.
SPEED
      And yet it cannot overtake your slow purse.
PROTEUS
      Come come, open the matter in brief: what said she?
SPEED
      Open your purse, that the money and the matter may
      be both at once delivered.
PROTEUS
125   Well, sir, here is for your pains. What said she?
SPEED
      Truly, sir, I think you'll hardly win her.
PROTEUS
      Why, couldst thou perceive so much from her?
SPEED
      Sir, I could perceive nothing at all from her; no,
      not so much as a ducat for delivering your letter:
130   and being so hard to me that brought your mind, I
      fear she'll prove as hard to you in telling your
      mind. Give her no token but stones; for she's as
      hard as steel.
PROTEUS
      What said she? nothing?
SPEED
135   No, not so much as 'Take this for thy pains.' To
      testify your bounty, I thank you, you have testerned
      me; in requital whereof, henceforth carry your
      letters yourself: and so, sir, I'll commend you to my master.
PROTEUS
      Go, go, be gone, to save your ship from wreck,
140   Which cannot perish having thee aboard,
      Being destined to a drier death on shore.

Exit SPEED

      I must go send some better messenger:
      I fear my Julia would not deign my lines,
      Receiving them from such a worthless post.
Exit
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